How to Raise Emotionally Resilient Children

How to Raise Emotionally Resilient Children


Parenting is not a cakewalk. It requires immense patience, effort, time, and a lot more. Raising children is a duty which is the most difficult role a person could ever take. The role becomes even more tougher if one has to raise emotionally resilient children. What exactly is emotional resilience? In simple terms, it means a person’s ability to deal with stressful life situations. To exhibit this trait, there are many factors, like age, experiences, gender, and culture, schooling, personality factors, however, a crucial factor is parenting. So, let us see how a parent can help their child become emotionally resilient.

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Role of Parents

Research has proven that emotionally resilient children are better at managing their emotions and combating all the stressful situations they experience in their lives. The period of childhood is often called the formative years of an individual’s life and any kind of psychological, physical, and social trauma can affect their personality to the core, resulting in mental and behavioural problems in adulthood. Yet, there are some children who despite all odds, come out stronger from their life struggles and emotional resilience is found to be one of the factors behind it. During childhood, parental exposure is the one thing that is closely related to the personality development of a child. If parents provide a nurturing environment, children can flourish, if an unhealthy environment is provided, their growth is affected severely.

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Fostering Healthy Relationships with Child

Researchers have time and again proven that out of all the factors, a healthy child-parent relationship can do wonders for a child’s development. Let us see how that can be developed:

1. Providing a supportive environment

It is very important, that parents provide a supportive environment for the growth of their children. If a parent is consistent in his approach to parenting, whether it’s about, providing the required care, spending quality time, helping with their homework, or playing with their children, it contributes to the healthy development of their children. And, this support becomes even more important when there is a time of crisis, say, a child is disturbed because they have an exam, or they have fought with their peers, or teachers scolded them, etc.

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2. Creating a safe home

Another very important factor is creating a safe space for children to grow. For example, if parents continuously fight, are strict with their children, and put limitations on them, their physical, and social needs are not met, all of these create distress for children. A home should be a peaceful and happy place for the child where they feel, warm, appreciated, and cared for. A responsible and sensitive parent can help their children grow emotionally and behaviorally.

3. Checking One’s Mental Health

It’s also important to keep a check on one’s mental health while catering to the needs of their offspring. There are several stressors in a person’s life and dealing with them effectively becomes very important to not get overwhelmed by them and impact one’s mental health. Children will do what they will see their parents. So, it becomes very important to show emotional resilience in the time of difficulty, so that their children can learn it too.

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4. Social-Emotional Schooling

When the foundation is laid early, its results are shown throughout the entire life. Parents must help their children to understand themselves better, whether it is about their competence or emotional needs. It involves, teaching their children about how to manage various relationships, how to make choices in life, how to lead one’s life, to develop self-awareness in them, and emotional intelligence in them. All of these things if started early can infuse the child with a greater sense of self and equip him/her with enough resources to deal when stressful situations.

Traits of Emotionally Resilient Children

Emotionally resilient children show the following traits:

  • They have high self-esteem,
  • They are good with their relationships,
  • They believe in their abilities are confident,
  • They cannot let difficult situations overpower them,
  • They also, perform tremendously well in their school.
  • They are goal-oriented and work dedicatedly towards it,
  • They are good at understanding and regulating their emotions,
  • They are hopeful about the future and don’t let negative emotions affect them,

Strategies for Raising Emotionally Resilient Children

Following are the techniques that parents can use to raise their children emotionally:

  • Openly communicating with your child, and
  • Teaching them coping and problem-solving skills,
  • Building a supportive network of family and friends.
  • Helping them to be independent and make their own choices,
  • Not setting unrealistic expectations and being strict with them,
  • Ensuring to provide their children with a secure attachment style,
  • Teaching to respect the emotions of others and being empathetic,
  • Encouraging them to think positively about situations rather than negatively,

In conclusion, today, the world in which we live is changing every second. There is so much competition around that it affects the mental health of children severely. In times like these, it becomes even more important to raise children who can monitor their emotions well and work accordingly. Parents must learn that to help their children thrive, they must not only protect them from the harsh world but also infuse in them all the coping mechanisms, that can help them fight through difficult times. Knowing how to bounce back from difficult situations, will help children with their overall health and parents have the biggest contribution to it.

References +
  • Bernard, M.E., Pires, D. (2006). Emotional Resilience in Children and Adolescence: Implications for Rational-Emotive Behavior Therapy. In: Ellis, A., Bernard, M.E. (eds) Rational Emotive Behavioral Approaches to Childhood Disorders. Springer, Boston, MA.
  • Scott, E., Ph.D. (2020, April 28). Why Emotional resilience is a trait you can develop. Verywell Mind.
  • Weir, K. (n.d.). Maximizing children’s resilience.

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