Relationship is defined as a bond where two or more individuals are coming together to form a bond amongst each other. We individuals have the tendency to connect with people around us and in doing so we form various relationships whether it’s with colleagues, romantic, friends, parents etc. They become the essential part of our life. Every relationship is unique and each has its own importance. Healthy relationship pushes the individual towards the healthy state of mind. Both partners respect each other. The positive environment created by healthy relationship is shared by everyone around you. It is said that when one feels good, the work quality also improves as well. Emotional connection, honesty, respect are the few of the traits of a healthy relationship. It is said “In a relationship when communication starts to fade, everything else will follow”. It means that communication is essential in any relationship without it every relationship will fall apart whether it’s a romantic one or with colleagues, friends, family etc. Earlier we talked about how healthy relationship leads to healthy state of mind but now comes the question what happens in terms of mental health when relationship fails.
Failed relationship has a profound impact on mental health of an individual. It drains the person emotionally. The deeper is the relationship, the deeper is the impact. Failed relationship is been described by the people as if they have been hit by boulder. They lose all their motivation to carry out any tasks. People go through surge of emotions like despair, self-blame, grieving, anger, denial and in some individuals, psychological disorder also manifests. It has been proven that deep sense of grief experienced by people can cause fluctuation in hormones secretion. For example: fight and flight hormone floods the body which causes increased heart rate and blood pressure. Thereby, causing stress in person which in turn has a severe impact on our immune system. There could be many reasons for failed relationships but if a relationship has hit rocks due to affair, it could lead to trauma for the other person. One may abstain from coming into relationship further or one may find difficulty in trusting which will have a huge impact on his/her future relationship. In order to cope up with grieve caused by failed relationship, some people choose alcohol or other substances that in turn cases dependency or addiction. In other words, there appears a drastic change in their body language due to failed relationships. Trauma that has resulted from affair can lead to heightened fear and anxiety, sleeplessness, flashbacks.
The pain experienced by the individual due to a failed relationship is as similar to physical pain which is indicated in the studies conducted in neuroscience. People often question themselves as to why their partner felt them. This intense feeling of rejection creates the hub for other psychological problems such as eating disorders, self- harm, adjustment disorder, negative body image. Hence, cognitive distortions manifest in our mind. Self-esteem also suffers due to failed relationships as individuals who have faced rejection will also develop tendencies of self-loathe. A study was conducted to see the effects of relationship dissolution on psychological well-being of an individual. The results showed that individuals who have gone through relationship dissolution reported anger and sadness and increased risk of developing major depressive disorders. The severity of mental issues will be more for the individual who are in relationship from long time than those who are in relationships for shorter periods. Further, if a person is in toxic relationship, the consequences of the failed relationship will be even more grave. Men are likely to suffer more due to failed relationships than women.
Men are likely to be dependent emotionally on their partners. In 2007, study has contended that men are more likely to develop suicidal ideation and sleep problems than women.
In addition to this, it’s the timing which matters as well when someone broke up. It means sudden break up will hit harder than break up which are well-thought. Marisa Cohen, Ph.D., an associate professor of psychology and co-founder of the self-awareness and bonding lab; a relationship science lab in New York has contended that bad break up can trigger mental health issues. According to her, there is a theory called diathesis stress model in which a person has a predisposition for the development of a disorder and life stressful events that are likely to surface and these environmental stressors serve as a catalyst. Individuals’ occupational, social life suffers as well as due to decreased mental health which arise due to failed relationship. Thus, ability to carry out basic tasks to function is seriously compromised.
These days people are seeking psychological help to deal with the aftereffects of failed relationship. Relationships have become necessities in today’s world. There could be many reasons one enters into a relationship. But when those relationship fails, it causes mental health issues to surface thereby affecting our well-being as a whole.
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