Have you ever wondered why your elder brother acts responsibly, your sister acts as the peace maker of the family, and you are the charmer and carefree person? Is it due to birth order or what else? It means the order in which you were born and in relation to your siblings, such as first-born, middle-born, last-born and only child in the family. Psychologists always look at how the birth order affects the individual. Is it by development, behaviour patterns and personality characteristics?
The Birth Order Theory
The most spoken theory behind the birth order and personality is the “ Alfred Birth Order Theory”. In the early 20th century, the Austrian psychiatrist introduced the concept of it, which creates an impact on personality and development. He was also the founder of individual psychology and was heavily influenced by the psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud. He also introduced the concept of “family constellation “, which means how the family creates an impact in shaping the individual’s future. (MSEd, 2024)
The Order and Its Characteristics
For many years and till now, it is said that firstborns experience the “only child” at first, enjoy and get lots of attention before their siblings arrive, and often create a sense of responsibility and leadership. The Late-born children have different personalities, like sometimes they feel overshadowed or indulged, impacting their own self-concept and behaviour
- Firstborn: These people tend to be responsible, calm and have higher well-being. (Sultan et al., 2020b). They also tend to leadership leadership-oriented as they receive a lot of attention from others to set an example for their siblings. (Vaghchipawala, 2023)
- Second-born: Second-born children are often known to be more diplomatic, flexible, independent, and good mediators in the family. As they have grown with less undivided attention from parents, leading them to seek attention outside the family, they develop negotiation skills and are more resilient and adaptable. (Desk, 2023)
- Lastborn: The lastborn or the Youngest child tends to receive the most attention in the family. They tend to be more adventurous, outgoing, charming, and creative; they lighten up the mood in the family. However, their activities lead to challenges with authority or responsibility.
- The only child: The only child tends to exhibit both introvert and extrovert characteristics, and they show high self-esteem and are high achievers. Sometimes they often face stereotypes and are self-sufficient and independent (learning to solve their own problems).
Read More: The Psychology Behind Why Eldest Children Are Given More Responsibility
What May be the Factors That Influence Them
Research says that there are a lot of influences that make them develop this personality. Some of them are:
- Parenting Styles: Parenting plays a major role in one’s life, which significantly shapes the child’s personality, behaviour, communication and interaction with others.
- Family Size and Dynamics: The Number of siblings and family interactions can directly influence the personality development in children. Mostly it depends on the family size.
- Cultural and Socioeconomic Context: In a few societies, Cultural norms and socioeconomic status impact the birth order, resulting in the development of personality.
- Genetic Predispositions: Genetic factors are a major factor that directly contributes to the development of personality traits, alongside environmental influences.
- Individual Experiences and Environment: Everyone is Unique, and each experiences different scenarios outside the family, which also shape their personality.
Read More: The link between Personality Traits and Relationship Satisfaction
Major Connection Between Personality and Birth Order
1. Role Expectations
It can influence roles and expectations within the family. Some families in the south side of India expect their firstborns to be resilient, responsible, and the second ones to follow their lead.
Read More: The Weight of Expectations: How Family Pressure Can Lead to Stress
2. Attention and Resources
The distribution of parental attention and resources varies by i. In India, usually the firstborn receives more attention than the second and third children. What influences the development of personality?
3. Sibling Interactions
Interactions with siblings can contribute to social skill development and personality. When the child interacts with his/her siblings, it allows them to better communicate and personality traits.
Read More: How to improve your social skills?
Conclusion
The relationship between birth order and personality is a complex one that is influenced by multiple factors, including family dynamics, parenting, culture, and individual unique experiences. While certain patterns and associations are observed, it is just one of many elements shaping an individual’s personality.
FAQs
1. Does birth order really affect our personality? Can you explain this?
Yes, I can explain this. They say that it is believed to influence our personality, but its impact is still debated and considered alongside some other factors like genetics, parenting, and environment. They also play a crucial role in affecting our personality.
2. What are some common traits of firstborn children?
There are a few traits that we can see in the firstborns. They often have a responsible, leadership-oriented mindset, which can be due to initial undivided parental attention and a need to be a role model for siblings.
3. How do only children differ from those with siblings?
The major difference is that Only children may exhibit strong self-esteem, independence, and adaptability, while children with siblings tend to be strong introverted, need guidance from their siblings and, with some studies showing they fare comparably to those with siblings in various aspects, they tend to solve their own problems independently.
4. “Birth order effects vary across cultures” Is this phrase true?
Yes, effects can really vary from different culture, their norms, values, systems and family structures. Which can directly or indirectly influence how it impacts personality and behaviour.
5. Is birth order true or the Only predictor of personality?
No, it is one of many influencing factors of personality; it may differ from individual experiences, and other environmental factors play significant roles.
References +
ScienceBeta. (2024, November 5). Birth order in Adlerian Psychology. ScienceBeta. https://sciencebeta.com/birth-order-adler/
Abpp, S. K. W. P. (2025, April 2). Psychology’s latest look inside the conundrum of birth order and personality. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-at-any-age/202503/could-your-personality-be-determined-by-your-birth-order
MSEd, K. C. (2025, September 25). How does birth order shape your personality? Verywell Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/how-does-birth-order-shape-your-personality-8431968
BetterHelp Editorial Team. (2025, September 9). Birth order Theory for personal insight. https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/family/birth-order-theory-insights-into-your-personality/
Murphy, T. F. (2025, September 15). Birth order. Psychology Fanatic. https://psychologyfanatic.com/birth-order/
BHSc, R. P. (2025, June 6). The Science Behind the Birth Order Theory: How external influences contribute to personality expression and Co. Biolife Health. https://www.biolifehealthcenter.com/post/the-science-behind-the-birth-order-theory-how-external-influences-contribute-to-personality-express