Grief is perhaps the most universal of all human experiences. Still, the traditions or “rules” around how one is allowed to grieve, how far into the future, and what we do about it, vary enormously from one culture to another. Healthy grieving is not a universally experienced phenomenon, but a cultural practice that uses emotions, rituals, and social systems to facilitate the adjustment of individuals and communities in the aftermath of loss (Rosenblatt, 2013 & Hilberdink et. al, 2023). What may be seen as “healthy” in one society may look strange and not exactly what one considers to be appropriate in another. By examining these cultural differences, we can learn the varied paths people take toward healing.
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The Role of Rituals and Mourning Customs
Rituals are how societies organise grief. There are structures and shared spaces where people can spend time together and express grief in a socially acceptable way. The funerary restrictions come, as in Western countries such as Britain, mourning rites have been short and formal. Germany, for instance, has generally had a mourning period of one year. This grieving period provides mourners a point of reference to come to terms with their loss within an established framework, eventually enabling them to emerge back into society.
In contrast, many non-Western cultures tend to observe mourning customs that are far longer, even sprawling over years or decades. Taking the traditional Chinese model, for instance, where mourning may officially last three calendar years, each new lunar phase reinforces ancestral duty and permanent attachment to the deceased. Balinese practice parallels this: funerary and post-burial rituals may stretch a full decade, the dead needing constant, intricate care to guarantee a tranquil transition.
These protracted rites are little more than grief; they are stitched into the social fabric, daily reminders of lineage and communal hierarchy, preserving connections between living, ancestral, and cyclical time (Hilberdink et. al, 2023 & Sabar, 2005). Across such observances— burials, period anniversaries, and cyclical memorial festivals— designated placeholders are established for sadness. This “safe space” channels sorrow as an authorised cultural release, permitting public mourning while simultaneously knitting the private ache into the community’s communal score.
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Kinship Systems and Collective Grieving
Families and kinship networks define how people declare and process grief. In many Western societies, kinship is bilateral and flexible. A person may anticipate ‘doing their own thing’ with the help of immediate family or friends, without the need for far-reaching social obligations.
On the other hand, collectivistic cultures support the idea that expiration becomes the concern of everyone. In patrilineal societies like Somalia or even in most Asian cultures, family members are responsible for performing rituals when someone dies, so no one carries the burden of grief alone. Likewise, in a lot of indigenous communities, mourning is a communal occasion. The entire clan or union takes part, reinforcing the strength of the clan or union and continuity of the relationship (Rosenblatt, 2013).
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Continuing Bonds with the Deceased
A standard belief in numerous psychological models in the West is that to grieve well, one must ‘detach’ from the deceased. However, many cultures around the world see connections to loved ones who have died as a crucial aspect of healing.
- In Japan, Buddhist customs perpetuate relationships with the dead, via household altars (butsudan), on which families place photos, ashes or offerings. Annual refreshers such as Obon, a festival that recalls spirits to the home, serve to remind us that the dead continue to participate in the family.
- In Mexico, the observance of the Day of the Dead (Día de los Muertos) is one of the brightest examples. Families construct altars (ofrendas) adorned with flowers, food and other items the deceased loved. The festival is far from melancholic; it is joyful, with the spirits alive and among the living (Sabar, 2000 & Silverman et. al, 2020).
Cultural Norms Around Emotional Expression
The distinct ways in which emotions are displayed in mourning are also culturally particular. Many Western societies expect that grief should be set aside, not shared with others and controlled. Overwhelming expressions of emotion can be considered inappropriate or distressing.
This illustrates a larger cultural value around controlling feelings and independence. In other cultures, mourning practices can be more demonstrative. In places like the Middle East or Africa, people view wailing, lamenting, or publicly displaying grief as part of the grieving process, which they consider healthy. Such practices allow for catharsis and honour the dead.
In other traditions, encouragement is shown for minimising visible demonstrations. In general, Tibetan Buddhist views on grief outwardly do not look like those of a majority of the people around the world; they rather express it through prayer, meditation and acceptance. This also corresponds to the spiritual emphasis on transience and detachment (Sabar, 2000 & Stelzer et. al, 2020).
These variations emphasise that people cannot evaluate grieving emotions on a one-size-fits-all basis. What is important is whether the sentiment falls within an accepted cultural framework and helps to facilitate the person’s process of grieving.
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Meaning-Making and Reframing Mediocrity in Grief
Meaning-making is one of the important psychological processes in all cultures. People make sense of loss by embedding it in broader narratives about life, death and purpose. When death rituals play out over years in other cultures, their continued nature allows mourners time to continuously remake their identity and renegotiate their role in society. People remind them that sadness is not an end but an event in a cycle of renewal and continuity.
At the same time, cultural narratives are devices that allow different forms of valuing contributions. For example, some Indigenous traditions focus on how the deceased contributed to community well-being rather than what they achieved as individuals. Through this cultural lens, grieving takes place not only of the individual’s life but also of the cultural values that shaped that life, and can serve as an opportunity to reflect on what is most important within the community.
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Clinical Implications of Cultural Perspectives
Knowledge of these cultural differences is of importance to both clinicians and mental health workers. “Complicated grief” or “prolonged grief disorder”, as defined by Western clinical models, follows guidelines of narrow frameworks for mourning and expectations of detachment. These criteria should not be generally applied, as applying them risks misdiagnosing individuals from cultures where long-term rituals or continuing bonds are normative (Hilberdink et. al, 2023, Sabar, 2000, & Bhugra, 2005).
Clinical services should take culturally appropriate approaches. This includes inquiring about the client’s cultural heritage, honouring ritual observance, and affirming expressions of grief that do not follow Western conventions. The integration of cultural sensitivity in evaluation and treatment could help to foster resilience and adaptation.
Case Studies: Grieving Across Cultures
- Western Europe: In Germany, the one-year period of mourning allows for a structured, yet time-limited space for grief, with an emphasis on reintegration into society.
- Japan: Buddhist practices maintain a continued connection with the dead through the use of ancestor altars and commemorative festivals, promoting continuity.
- Mexico: Day of the Dead honours the dead within the context of life on this earth, considering death as the natural part of the life cycle, a reality that is neither sad nor happy.
- Somalia: Patrilineal kinship systems divide grief duties within families, making more people available to render collective support.
- Tibet: Buddhist rituals focus on spiritual acceptance and detachment, with the bereaved discouraged from outward display of grief.
- Bali: Prolonged rituals, which can last as long as ten years, forge social order, and communities regain identity following loss.
- India: Indian customs and rituals around mourning are varied, just like the country’s plural religious and cultural fabric. Especially in Hindu practices, the mourning period lasts 13 days and is a time to celebrate the life of the deceased through rituals such as the Shraddha ceremonies. People say the customs pay homage to the soul travelling to the afterlife. Elaborate rituals such as the annual Pitru Paksha enable a family to help its ancestors while at the same time lay the foundation of a continued relationship between them and the deceased.
These examples show how varied the practice of “healthy grieving” looks when seen through cultural filters.
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Healthy Grieving as a Social and Psychological Process
In the end, a healthy grieving process is not good only for personal recovery but serves as a preparation for social readjustment as well. Rituals, kinship roles, continuing bonds, and normative beliefs about the expression of grief all contribute to holding the mourner within a larger sociocultural symbolic context. This perspective undermines the convenience of thinking that grief is entirely psychological or something private. Instead, it emphasises that social norms and cultural resources actively influence the grieving process.
Read More: The Other Side of Grief: Exploring Non-Traditional Bereavement
Conclusion
What other cultures can teach us about healthy grieving is that loss is never a solitary experience. It is always emergent between ritual, community, and meaning-making architectures that provide form to the otherwise chaotic event. Some societies prefer emotional detachment; others value emotional display. Some encourage detachment from the dead; others maintain ties that stretch across generations.
None of these is intrinsically more advanced than the other; they are responses that mirror cultural ideals, social structures and religious beliefs. Practitioners and caregivers must emphasise cultural sensitivity when supporting the bereaved. Healthy grieving, then, isn’t about sticking to a one-size-fits-all road map. It is about finding meaning, connection and healing in the cultural traditions that define our identities. By understanding this variety, we can more effectively honour the singular character of grieving and the profoundly social nature of it (Routledge, 2019).
FAQs
1. How do different cultures define healthy grieving?
Different cultures understand healthy grieving in different ways. Some societies emphasise private and time-bound grieving, while others encourage extended rituals, community participation, or ongoing connections with the deceased.
2. Why are rituals so important in mourning?
Rituals provide structure, meaning, and a shared language for grief. These practices help individuals process loss, reinforce community support, and ensure that people remember the deceased in culturally significant ways.
3. Is maintaining a bond with the deceased considered healthy?
Yes. Many cultures consider continuing bonds—such as ancestor worship in India, Obon festivals in Japan, or Día de los Muertos in Mexico—vital for healing and for keeping the deceased part of family life.
4. How do Indian traditions approach grief?
Indian traditions vary widely. Hindus perform 13-day mourning rituals and annual ancestor ceremonies, Muslims emphasise prayers and charitable acts, and Sikhs focus on communal prayer and spiritual acceptance. All approaches highlight community, remembrance, and acceptance.
5. What can clinicians learn from cultural variations in grief?
Clinicians can avoid imposing Western-centric ideas of grieving by respecting cultural practices, validating diverse rituals, and understanding how family and community structures shape emotional healing.
References +
Rosenblatt, P. C. (2013). Family grief in cross-cultural perspective. Family Science, 4(1), 12–19. https://doi.org/10.1080/19424620.2013.819226
Hilberdink, C. E., Ghainder, K., Dubanchet, A., Hinton, D., Djelantik, A. a. a. M. J., Hall, B. J., & Bui, E. (2023). Bereavement Issues and Prolonged Grief Disorder: A Global Perspective. Cambridge Prisms Global Mental Health, 1–37. https://doi.org/10.1017/gmh.2023.28
Sabar, S. (2000). Bereavement, Grief, and Mourning: A Gestalt Perspective. Gestalt Review. Volume 4 Issue 2. https://doi.org/10.5325/gestaltreview.4.2.0152
Silverman, G. S., Baroiller, A., & Hemer, S. R. (2020). Culture and grief: Ethnographic perspectives on ritual, relationships and remembering. Death Studies, 45(1), 1–8. https://doi.org/10.1080/07481187.2020.1851885
Stelzer, E., Zhou, N., Maercker, A., O’Connor, M., & Killikelly, C. (2020). Prolonged grief disorder and the cultural crisis. Frontiers in Psychology, 10. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2019.02982
Bhugra, D., Becker, M.A. (2005). Migration, cultural bereavement and cultural identity. Department of Psychiatry, Southern California Permanente Medical Group, San Diego, CA, USA.
Jacobsen, M.H., Petersen, A. (2019). Exploring grief. https://doi.org/10.4324/9780429201301
